Premiere continued....

Feel refreshed? OK, good, back at it...

It seems to me that everyone thought the premiere was soooooo good, we saw sooooo many new things, blah, blah, blah. My thoughts? Nuh-uh! While I did think that the first five minutes were, in fact, pure LOST genius, I feel much was left to be desired. I'm fairly disappointed that we didn't see anything other than the trials and tribulations of our triumvirate of star-crossed lovers, pre-island freak-out Jack, and a glimpse of island life prior to the arrival of our unlucky passengers of flight 815. With such a cataclysmic ending to last season, I personally would have liked to see how everyone fared. Next week, I suppose. Oh well. Onward and upward.

Ok, so, apparently, I need to switch doctors, and have The Others do all my labwork, since it appears, as evidenced by both Jack's and Kate's arms, that they can actually hit the vein on the first try! (Don't even get me started on those Navy doctors....grr.) And just why are The Others getting all Dracula-like on our buddies? Who knows?!! (Don't you just love this show?) And while they didn't show it, screencaps via the LOST website show that they did, indeed, take Sawyer's blood, too. (See photo number 16 of 43). And while we're on the screencaps, check out ..... wait a minute. Oooooo. Earlier today, while I was looking at the screencaps, there was a picture of a little girl in the holding cell with Jack, but it has apparently been taken down. Verrrrrrrry interesting. OK, never mind. Sorry about that. (For those who didn't see it, a girl looking very much like the little girl who was with the Tailies and was abducted by The Others was in the holding cell with Jack, and it was super creepy.)

So, now, I suppose, we should talk about each member of our ill-fated love triangle. We'll start with Jack, my favorite, because.... well, it's my blog and I can do what I want. So there.

Considering that Jack apparently graduated from medical school an entire year early, he sure doesn't think things all the way through. We saw him at the beginning of the episode stalking his soon-to-be ex-wife, Sarah, outside of a school (where a coupla guys, they were up to no good, started making trouble in the neighborhood.... oops, sorry, wrong show). Riddle me this, Batman: he SEES "the other guy" BEFORE he suspects his father, so what in the name of God's Green Goodness is the basis of his suspicions regarding Christian?! It just doesn't make sense! (Uh, hello, like anything on this show does!) We also find out that, prior to Jack's little bust-in on Christian's AA meeting, Daddy dearest had been sober for 50 days. (C'mon writers! Holy missed opportunity, Batman! Could've been 48 days...) So now it seems that there are 2 possible reasons for Christian's down-under adventures, and both of them are ultimately Jack's fault. Though, not gonna lie, I think Jackie boy did the right thing ratting out Daddy for OWI (for those of you not acronym-friendly, that's operating while intoxicated. Doy.) Although, I guess Jack's technically responsible for that, too, huh? Oi vey. Moving on to present-time Jack.We learn that he is being held in an underwater hatch called The Hydra, which used to be some sort of holding aquarium for sharks and/or dolphins. Would these sharks happen to have the Dharma logo on their tails like we saw in the S2 premiere?!.... Things that make you go hmmmmm...

On to our damsel in distress. Raise of hands by the people who thought the "here, put on this skimpy, cleavage-enhancing dress" was just a tad creepy..... riiiiiiight. Other (haha, I'm so pun-tastic) than her breakfast date with Benry (which I find to be an acceptable substitution for Fenry, dontcha think?) we don't really see a whole lot of our freckled friend. What we did see, however, raised many more questions. Unless she specifically asked for scrambled eggs and the bastards brought her fried eggs, my thoughts are that one's wrists don't usually look like that after breakfast. So what happened? The rumors I have heard, both online and via radio commentary, suggest that, in an effort to continue to populate the aforementioned utopian society, Kate was raped. While that might explain her clearly upset expression and why she pretty much burst into tears when she saw Sawyer, truth be told, I think that's a bit risque for LOST. Something traumatic definitely happened, and hey, maybe she was artificially inseminated or something, but let's not jump to conclusions quite yet. I mean, they did give her flips flops with that dress. Maybe she just stubbed her toe or something. Either way, I'm beginning to think Sawyer will be there to comfort her when the truth comes out. You know, comfort her like he comforted Ana-Lucia. Catch my drift?

Sawyer, on the other hand, seems to be adapting to his new digs pretty well. Quote of the night goes to Zeke: "Well, lookie there, you got yourself a fish biscuit." Personally, I can't think of anything more appetizing than a fish biscuit, but darn it all to heck (better, Ma? she says I need to watch my language) if fish doesn't have mercury in it, and we all know that mercury's bad for little Ziggy. Apparently, Sawyer agrees with me, considering how quickly he offered his delicacy to Kate. Zeke's next comment, however, shed some light on an as-yet-unsolved island mystery: "Only took the bears 2 hours." Was he talking about polar bears?! And P.S.: Who is Carl? Why is he important? Stop bringing in all these new characters! I can hardly keep up with the ones we've got! I'm sure he'll prove to be important later, and that he'll pop up again somewhere unexpected. Whatever.

My brain hurts.